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Where should I talk to…?

Is talking to a friend the same as talking to a professional therapist? Is it worth talking to a therapist after all?
I have come across various people who feel it is best to talk to a friend or a family member about anything that troubles them, rather than go and see a therapist. I guess this is a valid point and something to respect as it is linked to familiarity, safety and knowing what to expect.
What do you talk about with your friends? Is it TV, fashion, what you had for breakfast, possible plans for the weekends and so on? This is one aspect of sharing everydayness and is OK to do so, we all do it. It is normal. Maybe you also talk to a friend about something that you would like to buy or about what happened at last night’s favourite TV show and discuss about the plot of that episode and possibly gossip on the characters. This is normal as well. We do this and we exchange and form opinions without any specific expectation. These conversations to do not affect us and they are rathe…

The therapist as a Transitional Object

When people find themselves in a vulnerable position, for one reason or the other, they tend to seek help. People may look for comfort in either objects i.e. a teddy bear, alcohol or subjects i.e. people or animals. Vulnerability and need for comfort may have varying degrees and are rather subjective terms between individuals. However, there seems to be the need for something independent from the individual so they can ‘hold on’ and, maybe, feel ‘held back’ at the same time.
Some examples could be the baby who has a favourite blanket or toy that bites or sucks and uses whenever in distress, or the adult who keeps a blanket from their childhood as it reminds them of happier times and when they feel stressed they use it to cover themselves. However, these may sound more as habits but they may also symbolise something more.
In an effort to link what has been mentioned so far with psychotherapy, one could boldly make an analogy by stressing that therapists themselves can be seen both as suc…

Getting caught: Essay on Projective Identification

One could say that building a relationship with another individual in everyday life, could be seen as a challenging task. Trust, intimacy and other factors, which may be considered as crucial in forming a relationship (Davey, 2008), do require psychological and emotional investment. In the light of this, psychotherapy also requires a relationship to be built, the therapeutic relationship; that could potentially be seen as similar to an everyday relationship. Coming from clinical practice though, I can see that everyday relationships with people and  the therapeutic relationship can differ in many levels, mostly due to the so called 'therapeutic boundaries'. The main focus of this essay will not be the therapeutic boundaries (which will be investigated as a topic at a later post). 
Coming back to the subject at hand, various studies in the field of psychotherapy (Fiedler, 1950; Gaston, 1990; Lambert & Barley, 2001) have also stressed the importance of the therapeutic relatio…